PLAYER PROFILE

Exaggeration, blatant lies and a smattering of the truth, each month we bring you a not-so-serious profile of the 'stars' of Redmires Football Club.........

 

Tom Lawrence Tom Lawrence is one of the eldest statesmen of the side, currently in his ninth season with the club. Although Tom was signed from Porter FC he actually started his footballing career at Redmires as a Junior at Under 15's.  Before Tom looked old enough to buy alcohol (13 years and 4 months) he was a keen cross country runner and actually represented South Yorkshire FACT. However, after his first trip to the Banner Cross Off License in May 1993 and his first taste of Diamond White, Cider and The Wife Beater... he was hooked. Needless to say his running career soon went down the toilet (like a few of his cocktails) and he was forced to try another sport. After failing a trial for the girls netball team, Tom eventually managed to sneak into the School Football side, although it is unclear whether this was the boys or the girls side.  Tom started his Redmires career as a Centre Forward and having fooled everyone into believing that he'd actually played in that position before, photographic evidence was found that proved this wasn't the case..."The Camp Footballer" [See Trivia Page]. It soon became clear that Tom should never be allowed to take a Centre again. Therefore, Tom was moved as far away from the centre as we could get him... Right Back.  Under the coaching guidance of Roger Milnes telling Tom where to stand and how to tackle, Tom was soon converted into a solid defender and he picked up the Most Improved Player Award in the 2001/02 season. By this time Tom had realised that after drinking heavily on a Saturday night the best hangover cure was to play football on a Sunday morning (even now if you get close enough to Tom on a Sunday morning you can still smell the toilets from The Kingdom nightclub where Tom would have been for most of the night getting off with the bog.!) Under the supervision of recent Managers, John Davies and Del Siggs, Tom has been able to move into the centre of the defence, where in 2004 he was informed that you are actually allowed to head the ball and Tom at 6"3 finally started to use this to his advantage. With the improvement in Tom's game evident he again received the Club's Most Improved Player Award for the 2004/05 season.   Date Of Birth 14/12/1978 Occupation Surveyor Position Centre Half or Right Back Nick Name "The Camp Footballer"  Most Likely To Say....... "Who's round is it?", "Tommmmmmmmms", "Get your money out", "Shut that door" Car Red Seat Ibiza Favourite Footballer Justine Fashanu Favourite Team Sheffield Wednesday Most Memorable Goal Not including own goals... and there have been a few of those... probably a bullet header against Yorkshire Main in the last 5 minutes of the final game of the 2001/02 season. Hobbies Drinking, Watching Wednesday, DIY, Golf, Bedroom Gymnastics Favourite Music Wham, Pet Shop Boys, George Michael, Village People Favourite Song YMCA Favourite TV Program Coronation Street, Eastenders, Property Ladder Favourite Film The Godfather, Goodfellas, Shaving Ryan's Privates Favourite Food Sandwiches, Mince Favourite Drink The Wife Beater  Merits Redmires FC Most Improved Player 2001-02 & 2004-05 Claims To Fame For the past two seasons Tom has taken on the role of 'Treasurer' for the club and he claims that in this time there has been a huge increase of club funds. However, although Redmires have noticed a slight increase in club funds, it has been rumoured that Tom has been on a few more than usual skiing trips this year. A full investigation is pending. Purchased 50 bottles of Budweiser from Champs for the 2005/06 FA Cup Final.   Tom Lawrence... AKA "The Camp Footballer" Tom celebrating his Most Memorable Goal! Tom in his latest audition for the YMCA!